August 25, 2014 by phicks2012
I’m generally an optimist and a dreamer. I like to look on the positive side, but not always. We’ve all been there, right?. While it rarely lasts very long for me, every now and then I look around me and find myself thinking I might as well just chalk it all up to experience and get a CLUE.
Unless we’re totally surrounded by Negatives Nellies, people are always telling us when we’re down that good things will happen –that our ships will come in and that finances will improve — that prayers will be answered and that God will provide — and that we’ll find true love when we least expect it. Sadly, in my experience none of those platitudes are generally true, and since I haven’t been “expecting” true love for years now, I’m thinking I’m WAY overdue to be proven wrong about THAT one!
The price of living continues to rise, and as we age — which we all do eventually if we don’t live fast and die young — we find it harder and harder to find gainful employment for a decent wage where we are not driving for over an hour to get there and working under the supervision at least one total asshole. Oh, come on! Tell me you haven’t “been there”!
People ask for favors, promising to repay us, and never do. Instead, they turn around and ask again — and then get upset with us if, out of sheer self-preservation, we finally actually refuse. Give me a BREAK!
We get emails and phone calls from bogus charities asking us to save the world, and from shady televangelists suggesting that we need to make our peace with God by sending them money, and from Nigerians offering us huge bogus windfalls, and in the meanwhile we struggle to pay our bills and our taxes with neither charities, nor televangelists, nor Nigerians offering any help. Imagine THAT!!
We pray for strength, help, wisdom, health, happiness, romance, the end of financial woes, and the well-being of loved ones, and God does not appear to “provide”. Loved ones die or abandon us, we continue to make really bad choices — cross wisdom off of the list — to struggle financially and to wonder how so many people actually manage to hold onto their faith and optimism when the world around them seems to be caving in, when true friendship and love seem so bloody elusive, and when there never seem to be any real answers — or any miracles that aren’t televised on one of the religious channels or the result of cinematic special effects.
We look and hope for “true love”, and for a soul-mate to meet us halfway, and many of us have our hearts spindled, folded, and mutilated — too old a pop reference? — until we finally pretty much lose all belief in happily ever after, and until so many false friends and lovers have waltzed merrily through our lives that we stop believing for the most part in the veracity of anyone professing to care for us, or promising to stay. We start looking at people and seeing only potential takers — which is REALLY depressing, right? — who want something from us. We see glasses half empty, and grifters who are looking for financial support or for a care-giver — people who we figure will walk away without a backward glance once they find a better deal, or run like rabbits if we stop supporting them or make any demands upon them in turn. Been there. Seen that. Don’t want the T-shirt.
So on that quasi-depressing note, here is a verse written during one of those unfortunate and irritating emotional downturns to express disillusionment, frustration, and more than a little random annoyance. You may or may not like it, or agree with it, but here it is.
“Ships Coming In”
Oh, your ship may come in, but crash into the dock,
Being pierced through the hull, and then sink like a rock.
Going straight the the bottom before you can claim
Any part of the cargo that manifests name.
If your number comes up, and you reach for the prize,
They may send you a voucher that only applies
If you shop at a store that you never frequent,
And you use it a week before it was first sent.
All your prayers may be answered if what you desire
Isn’t anything much, and you do not require
Very much of an answer, and what you demand
Isn’t much to solicit from God or from man.
You’ll find steady employment, but only part time,
And once mileage is figured you won’t make a dime,
While you’re slaving away for that minimum wage
For a boss who incites only lunatic rage.
And you’ll always have friends if when they need a hand
You are free with your money and ready to stand
By their side sure and strong when they want you to stay,
But when you need support most will never repay.
And if love comes along, being clearly professed
You may quickly discover that passion expressed
May be easily feigned when someone has a need
And you’re lonely enough to be blind to their greed.
You’ll be offered a million. If only you’ll aid
Some Nigerian Prince, then your fortunate is made,
So you give them the numbers the cash to apply;
They’ll clean out your account. Kiss your money goodbye.
You can dream all you want, and believe as you may
That your dreams can come true on some wonderous day,
If you only believe, but the truth must be told,
You can dream all through life and emerge only old.
You can pray, and imagine; envision and dream
That the future will glisten, and fortune will deem
That you may be deserving of winning at last,
But your ship still comes in without cargo or mast.
[27 July, 2014]