Rumor Has It!


November 12, 2012 by phicks2012

I have a security system, but I was complaining the other day about the cost of monitoring and it was suggested to me that I could simply take advantage of the various urban myths that are still circulating about my house to keep would-be robbers at bay.

There are a number of these legends, most of which deal with the house being haunted, and my friend suggested that since most crack-heads and meth-heads are paranoid anyway, I could probably keep THEM, at least, well away from my house by adding to the legends rather than by debunking them as they so richly deserve.

It was suggested that I claim the house was built over an Indian burial ground, that it was haunted by Civil War soldiers, and that it was guarded by a ghostly guard dog sort of like the Hound of the Baskervilles.

I’ll admit that I found the idea of economizing by capitalizing on the stupidity and paranoia of chemically brain-fried criminals intriguing, but how well, I ask, does this work for felons who are simply greedy and unprincipled without necessarily being addicted to something that is rapidly killing off whatever brain cells they might have had to begin with?

Since I live in a castle, can I start a rumor that the place is equipped with pit traps and arrow slits, and has boiling oil that pours down from the non-existent parapets?

What do YOU think? Mwahahaha!

4 thoughts on “Rumor Has It!

  1. bragg says:

    I can say,from my time as a security alarm installer, that MOST of us are free from the worry of being burgeled.. you more so than most, that being said, there is nothing wrong with taking precautions, minions with bows and arrows are good,as well as free roaming Rottweilers 🙂 to each is own..boiling oil, ,,,don’t waste the oil, just pour boiling water.

    • phicks2012 says:

      The more dated rumors are unlikely to discourage psychotic former housemates in any case, so adding free-roaming Rottweilers, attack-trained Siamese Cats, and Squires with a reputation to enhance might not be an altogether bad thing, however we look at it. I do also have a number of excellent archers (who would love to practice on moving targets) in my circle of friends, and plenty of water to boil, so nebulous wandering spirits might not actually be necessary — just highly entertaining. 😉

  2. Jack Minor says:

    Beautiful home. How big is it?

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November 2012


I am an active, outgoing person interested in all sorts of things and all sorts of people! I'm constantly discovering new interests, and expect that to continue right into the grave!

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